Octopus walks into a bar, says.. l bet l can play any instrument.
Bloke gives him a guitar which he plays better than Jimmy hendrix.
2nd bloke says...Bet you cant play the piano. The octopus plays better than Elton John.
Jock gives him the bagpipes, the octopus fumbles for a minute and looks confused,
Jock says... Ha, can ye nae play it?
Octopus ... Play it? lm going to sh*g it as soon as l get its f***king pyjamas off.