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Thread: Worst thing your dog's ever done?

  1. #1

    Worst thing your dog's ever done?

    Last night mine pinched my dinner off the kitchen worktop before I could cook it. Got me thinking about what the worst things she's ever done was and whether anyone has any similar war stories for our amusement.

    My girl's worst event was when she went missing for a few hours one night. I wandered all over the village shouting for her, before spotting her in the pub car park. She must have been ignoring me, because she was in earshot the whole time. She looked suspiciously fat but she's a lab so I thought she was probably in the bins or something and frogmarched her home. Took her for a walk at the end of the night as usual and nothing happened.

    Next morning...scene from a disaster movie. She had exploded with diarrhea in the night. An absolutely enormous quantity of ****ty oil was covering the flagstones of three rooms and the new limestone floor in the kitchen. It took about two hours of mopping a deep scrubbing the porous stone to clean it all up on hands and knees, trying not to retch the whole time.

    When I got to the pub to see if I could spot what she'd been up to, there was a huge open vat of used chip oil out the back. She'd been sitting there for hours drinking her fill until she was the size of a baconer. I missed it in the dark, or I'd have left her in the garden overnight!

  2. #2
    Oh, my god!!!

    My old Labrador Ben disappeared during a shoot lunch once. I was all round the farm buildings calling for him until he was discovered fast asleep in a Labrador-sized hole he'd eaten in pile of sheep nuts. Little bugger was in disgrace and spent the rest of the day in the back of the car. Where he ate my boots
    A Man should be wise, but never too wise. He who does not know his fate in advance is free of care

  3. #3
    Once has a lurcher pup who thought my new swarovski binoculars where a Chew toy , my fault I suppose for leaving them out !

  4. #4
    chewed one of my boys football boots up 90.00 he only had them a fews days ,took it off the work bench went out into garden and chewed the back off .he was not

  5. #5
    Teckel 1 chewed carpet in which I replaced with hard wood flooring.
    Teckel 2 culled last year's welsummer chicken hatchings approx cost 600
    Teckel 3 farts stink.

    Still bloody love them.

  6. #6
    When I was walking my spaniels along a local beach one of them stole all the sausages off an unattended BBQ, I was still within earshot when the group of lads returned from their swim and blamed each other for scoffing them!

  7. #7
    SD Regular willie_gunn's Avatar
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    Aug 2008
    Oxfordshire, Wiltshire, Berkshire....and Sutherland
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    We headed up to Scotland for our annual trip.

    Stopping at a B&B we left the dogs, as we normally do, in the car overnight.

    On coming down to the car the next morning I got into the drivers seat and noticed a small patch of DPM material on the floor. Thinking nothing of it we drove on. At the end of the day I got out and, because it was raining, put on my Gore-Tex outer shell, only to find that it no longer resembled a shell so much as a paper doily!

    As you can probably guess, my lab had smelt the dog biscuit I had inadvertently left in the pocket and found his way to it by eating the coat from the outside in.

    My own stupid fault, but that didn't stop him looking guilty.
    O wad some Power the giftie gie us to see oursels as ithers see us!

  8. #8
    Top of a munro, chap got there before us, he is sat resting, enjoying the view and about to have his well deserved lunch.

    We said hello and our friendly lab was pottering. Having got a wiff of ham and cheddar (no mustard) she then walked up behind him and scoffed his sandwiches in one go. So embarrassing.

  9. #9
    My lab is usually well behaved and never steals food, but last Christmas be sorted a whole dish of dauphinoise potatoes - think he likes garlic......

  10. #10
    My teckel of one careful previous owner once launched himself into the wife's lap and grabbed the opposite side of a barbecued steak sandwich which she was just taking a bite out of. Totally hilarious to watch. This wasnt long at all after I'd brought him home, so he clearly wasn't experiencing any problems settling in.
    Same dog at local small country fair stuck his head through the fence at the petting zoo and nibbled a goat's arse. Not enough to draw blood, but enough to make it jump and prompt us to move along quickly!

    My GWP/Lab bitch at around 5 months old once ate as much freshly baked chocolate cake as she could reach from the kitchen worktop whilst standing on her back legs.
    Chewed a hole through a jumper I was still wearing when she was a pup, when I fell asleep on the sofa. Woke up with a wet patch of exposed skin on my stomach
    See my blog for - My kindly sponsored DSC1 course and chart my progress from deer virgin to stalking veteran
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