Clyde died in a fire and was burnt pretty bad and the morgue needed someone to identify the body. So his two best friends, Clem and Zeke, were sent for.
Clem went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Clem said “Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over." So the mortician rolled him over and Clem looked down and said "Nope, it isn’t Clyde."
The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought in Zeke to identify the body and Zeke took a look at him and said “Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over." The mortician rolled
him over and Zeke looked down and said "No, it isn’t Clyde."
The mortician asked "How can you tell? Zeke said "Well, Clyde had two assholes." "What? He had two assholes?" said the mortician.
"Yup, everyone in town knew he had two assholes. Every time we went to town, folks would say 'here comes Clyde with the two assholes.'"