I was driving to a local stalking ground this morning and decided to stop off and fill the car with petrol as it was only £1.26/l in the local Asda (ONLY!!)
The auotstop on the filler didnt work and I ended up with the arm of my coat getting soaked in petrol, perfect, great scent for stalking.
I decided to carry on to the ground anyway resigned to stinking of petrol all day.
To calm myself I decided to have a cigarette. As I lit it my coat arm caught fire so I managed to get the window down hoping to quench the flames in the strong wind.
At this point a police car coming towards me flashed his lights then spun around and pulled me over, grabbed the extinguisher out of his patrol car and put the flames out.
He then gets his ticket pad out and starts writing me up! I asked what for?
He reckons I had an illegal fire arm