Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, "Its the chemist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone."

Immediately the husband drove to the shop to confront the chemist and demand an apology.

Before he could say more than a word or two, the chemist told him, "Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I locked the house with both house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my keys. Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket."

"Later, when I was about three miles from the store, I had a flat tyre. When I finally got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook."

He continued, Then I had to break into a bag of coins to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the coins; the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it...half of them hit the floor and broke."

"Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer...and believe me mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her!"