Two Australian stalkers Bruce and Pete were out one day in the bush, when Pete was taken short and needed a quick pony and trap, so he dropped his strides on the spot to do a thrommer but he wasnt aware that he was about to drop one on a rattlesnake, just at that moment the rattlesnake struck, right on his scrotal sack

Ferk me Bruce he said to his mate this *******s nailed me what do you think i should do now mate.

Dont know he replied I best ring the flying doctor .
So his mate Bruce contacted the flying doctor and explained the situation.

Blimey said the doctor this sounds serious as i am over 3000 miles from you and it will take me hours to get there. What your going to have to do Bruce is make an incision into Petes scrotal sack on both sides of the rattler strike . then your going to have to suck out all the poison if you dont do this he will be dead in approx 30 minutes.

So he goes back to Bruce and Bruce asks what the flying doctor had said.

He reckons you will be dead in 1/2 hr.