Sorry to break some illusions guys just in case some of you still believe in father Christmas but as a part time Santa I'm disgusted !
I work on the grounds at a prep school and each year am asked by the head of the pre prep (real small kids 4/5 ) to be Santa .
so I got into my costume and stuffed my already fat belly with a pillow and got into a ho ho ho frame of mind not easy as I'm knackered .
i jingled into the main hall to an excited audience and had them eating out of my hands with tales of rudolf knowing I had two of his cousins in my chiller ! I gave out the presents to the excited children who on the whole were polite and smiley .i was nearly over and was really starting to enjoy it and coming out of my grumpy mood doing a little question and anwser about Lapland Ect when a child grabbed my hat from behind and shouted I wasn't father Xmas on scrabbling round another grabbed my beard yelling I was a fake not a real santa well I was mortified and looked for support from the staff who were equally shocked .
i didn't want to do it this year but my mates at work weren't going to step in either and the new head is very pretty and I'm a sucker for the eye fluttering so agreed but as this assault on Santa continued I thought hang on a minute I'll decide who the bloody Santa are around here ! Not you you little sh##s ,I feel deeply traumatised and had I not got to be going to a funeral tomorrow would have taken a day off sick with post Xmas stress disorder .so beware potential Santa the tide is turning and the kids don't believe like they used to or is it because I've shot a few of rudolfs cousins and have bad karma .