As new, used once, (waste of fecking time if you ask me!)
Assorted selection of 1200 brand new lights that have a half life of 7.5 hours before yet another bulb pops
180yds of chintzy, tatty tinsel that shed unmovable slivers on any clothing passing within a 6ft radius of it
Wreath of Death that has points sharper than chemically sharpened fish hooks and will remove the eye of any unsuspecting drunkard who approached the front door
Large selection of tree baubles that despite 6" of loop will fall off at will, usually just as you are about to fall asleep in front of the fire.
glad to see the back of them
If I have my way we won't ever be needing them or anything similar again!!
Comes with a free selection of unwanted tat given as a vague gesture of gift giving by people who clearly have too much money and no taste, including:
- Wine bottle neck dribble catcher! (I mean come on! if you can't pour without dribbling stop using glasses)
- A Photo Album - A what? Wouldn't even know where to get photos developed! and certainly wouldn't stick them in that!!
- A selection of "Finest" chocolates (5% cocoa solids!! "Finest" my ass!)
- A Bottle of White wine from Georgia - yes that place in Russia. That's what I thought too. no fecking way that is passing my lips, probably go blind!)
Will throw in your selection of 5-7ft trees that are blowing round my neighbourhood that the Council STILL haven't collected.
(Its the 10th of Jan you lazy b@stards! Plenty of staff to tow cars away but you can't fill in pot holes or collect the bins!!)
job lot £2.60
Get in early for next year,