"G'day mate, Aussie Helpline...What's the problem cobber?"
"I'm in the outback and Blue's been bitten on the end of his penis by a poisonous snake,
what should I do?"
"No problem. Make a small incision and suck the poison out. It'll save him."
"There's no other way?"
"Blue mate,bad news, it's hopeless. The bloke on the Helpline says you're gonna die."