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Thread: Stalking Walts...

  1. #1

    Stalking Walts...

    I dont know how I do it, maybe its my inbuilt idiot magnet, or maybe my looks, but they seem to flock around me like moths to a bulb at any social setting...

    Walter fecking mittys!

    I dont know how the conversation turned to it, I seem to remember some mention of Sparsholt college and from that point he revealed that he was thinking about a course there... I should have run away at that point, but before I knew it he's telling me that he's ex-forces (my spidey senses start tingling) does a bit of stalking, and how he was really lucky as a local farmer lets him take the deer on his land, that he had the fields between two hangars, and that he's able to sit on the edge of one and take them on the other edge at 600 yards

    as you can imagine this is the point where I choke on my drink a little bit and start coughing and looking for the exit... no, I'm trapped, feck, how do I extricate myself from this situation without causing offence to my hosts and other guests...

    So, impressed of course, I ask what calibre he uses - as you can guess the answer is 7.62... I'm being drawn in by now, I cannot help myself - how far can he dig?

    "oh, alright, what range do you zero at? don't you find the bullet drop a bit excessive ?"
    300 yards, no not a problem...
    "Oh, do you dial it in to the scope for each shot then, I suppose you use a laser rangefinder because the drop at 600 is going to be massive"
    of course, you guessed it, yes, he uses one of those laser rangefinders...
    "look mate, I don't want to sound funny, but if you're shooting at that range I'd be surprised if you can guarantee a humane kill - I've not known many stalkers go beyond a couple of hundred metres for lowland stalking, most woodland stuff is below 100"
    oh, oh, erm, I'm surprised at that, I wouldn't have thought you'd need a scope for that, why not just use iron sights...
    "sorry, I'll be back in a minute, need to go to the bog..."

    So, is it just me? am I a frigging walt magnet or do the rest of you seem to attract them like flies round *****?

  2. #2
    His brother lives along the road from me ??

  3. #3
    Hahaha, yes i know the type, I recently met a woman who was from west london, you know the type, every sentence ends in 'darling'... I mention about shooting and she launches off into one about how she wouldn't be seen dead with anything but her own pair of purdeys.. Hmmm, well you know, i thought shes a potential posh bird and daddy could have shot.. She also led me to believe she was a wizz at french cuisine..

    I asked her a simple question.. ''So, do you shoot left handed or right handed..?' ANSWER... 'both..'
    I reply 'Oh right, thats a skill to have.. are your pair of purdeys 12 or 20? ANSWER 'I think theyre 20, oh wait, no they're 12 INCHES...'

    Ah right, bet you get a bit of spread with those!?.. I took a big gulp of wine and moved swiftly on..

    .... She also put me off cheesecake for months (which as griff will tell you, it takes a lot to put me off my food!)

    I was last seen as a trail of dust running for a forestry block!

  4. #4
    2434me,we have a lot of them here in Aberdeenshire,3 of them along our road end,all experts and kill less than 5 deer a year,if that.all at extreme ranges,blah blah blah.I just ignore all the rubbish an take it all in an have a laugh to myself,you've got to cos what you find is they know it all anyway
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  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by Wolverine View Post
    they know it all anyway
    They can't possible know it all because my wife does and according to her, no-one knows as much as her. That's why she's always in the right!

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Wolverine View Post
    2434me,we have a lot of them here in Aberdeenshire,3 of them along our road end,all experts and kill less than 5 deer a year,if that.all at extreme ranges,blah blah blah.I just ignore all the rubbish an take it all in an have a laugh to myself,you've got to cos what you find is they know it all anyway
    I bet people like that kill a lot less than they shoot at!! I had a young lad I work with tell me he was in to stalking reds in scotland. I asked what rifle he had; he replied a 22 250. I pointed out the legal requrements for scotland; he was clueless. Dont get me wrong, I am sure quite a few reds fall to the 22 250 but I am sure all of their owners know they are treading on the wrong side of the law!!


  7. #7
    Funnily enough I met an "ex-foreign legion sniper" at a party last night, who some kind soul had told thet I did some deer stalking. He was very pleased to tell me that I was doing it all wrong, shooting at such close ranges. Then he started on a friend (Mick) who stalks too, he had stupidly tried to rescue me from the moron, of course it ended badly. My mate Mick has a short fuse. Still, they say "Vanish" gets rid of blood stains from carpets!

    So, no you'r not alone!

    Blindness to suffering is an inherent consequence of natural selection. Nature is neither kind nor cruel but fiercely indifferent.

  8. #8
    Some people want to make there life more exciting and they stretch the truth some way. If you not happy with what you got and you want some one else,s life then you beter pray for reincarnashion

  9. #9
    I really shouldn't make this known , but here goes, I used to work away a great deal, making repairs to cement kilns & refinery plant, I was christened "Magnet" by all the crews we worked with, due to the uncanny knack of attracting the very type the op speaks of, one memorable instance sticks with me, in a pub in that beautiful place known as Dunbar, a chap was holding forth on his job as a nuclear something or other, when he asked my mate & I what we did for a living & why were we there, we told him we were "Fusion technicians", (Welders)......... he was very quiet after that, all my work above the wall is signed in chalk, "MAGNET".
    (The Unspeakable In Pursuit Of The Uneatable.) " If I can help, I will help!." Former S.A.C.S. member!

  10. #10
    The old addage of "those that talk about it don't do it"and if they do, they do it very badly! Me I do everything badly, but on the bright side, I'm bloody good at doing whatever it is badly...


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