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Thread: dumb and dumber... what we do for deer

  1. #1

    dumb and dumber... what we do for deer

    Most of the day after our morning stalk we spent the time demolishing our caravan turning it into a kick ass trailor. We folded all the aluminium for pick up and burned the wood waste from it. So we were a bit knacked but wanted another go at the deer so Big Steve went to sit in the high seat and I wandered round.

    At 6.30 and darkening up at the top corner of the ground as far away as you can get from the road there's a corner with a nice field of vision where reds and sika often come out to mooch about but nothing was there. I was about to give up and head back to get big Steve from the high seat but mid stream of a well deserved wizz I looked up to see a red coming out of the wood only about 60m away, then another and by the time I'd rushed the todger away and pretty much finished in my wellie there was 9 stags out and grazing. Didn't need to move anywhere and dropped the legs of the bipod and got soaked the second I got down. I didn't want to fanny about and dropped the one with the least antler which seemed light the lightest when the shot was on. Here's where things began to go wrong.

    On follow up the thing was actually a bit of a donkey, it's getting dark fast and it's a drag to the road is a solid 1000m. We were already monged from the days caravan bashing. Big Steve trundles over from the high seat and comes up with the bright plan to get the car up the estate track and if we cross the little river it would half the distance to a pick up point.

    Fine then, so we cross the little river (about 100m away) with donkey and I'm left to gralloch while he gets the car. An HOUR later and dark he come back with a change of plan because he had trouble crossing some marshy ground near the road. So it's back over the river again keeping the gralloched beast lifted out of the water and when we got it on the bank Big Steve bends over to wash his hands and drops his iphone in the water priceless fail.

    After that and and hour of mans work we get to the road shagged but relieved. The car however is now the better park of the same distance to go back from where we started the drag since Big Steve drove it to a 'closer point'

    Lessons learned....
    Don't listen to big Steve
    Don't shoot donky far away on darkening
    Should have traded the wife for a quad bike

  2. #2
    All good fun, as for the Quad, you may be better trading big Steve for it

    Neil.

  3. #3
    And you'll run out to do it all again next week......yup, we're all numpties.

    We've all been there and done that.

  4. #4
    , Maybe you should christen Steve, like in that film Crocodile Dundee...."I don't need a gun, "......... "Iv'e got a Donk!"
    (The Unspeakable In Pursuit Of The Uneatable.) " If I can help, I will help!." Former S.A.C.S. member!

  5. #5
    Ha ha funny story.... reminds me of a weekend down in Horsham earlier this year when my stalking partner and I had to drag a rather large roe 400 yds back to the track at sunset, we hadn't taken the quad on that occasion and when I walked to get the Hilux the interior light was on and the battery had gone flat so I had to phone someone to come with jump leads.
    We did a gralloch under headlights that evening and boy did I sleep well that night.
    "It's halfway down the hill, directly below that tree next to a rock that looks like a bell-end"

    Good deals with ~ deako ~ sakowsm ~ dryan ~ 2734neil ~ mo ~ riggers ~ mmbeatle ~ seanct ~ an du ru fox

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Si View Post
    I had to drag a rather large roe 400 yds back to the track at sunset.
    You're kidding, right? I wish it was always that easy.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by scotsgun View Post
    You're kidding, right? I wish it was always that easy.
    it wasn't so much the drag, although it was up hill... more the trek back to the car and all the fannying around that followed. At least I didn't drop my phone in a river like big steve did, so I could phone my mate and he got his uncle to come and rescue us.
    "It's halfway down the hill, directly below that tree next to a rock that looks like a bell-end"

    Good deals with ~ deako ~ sakowsm ~ dryan ~ 2734neil ~ mo ~ riggers ~ mmbeatle ~ seanct ~ an du ru fox

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by paul at barony View Post

    Lessons learned....
    Don't listen to big Steve
    Don't shoot donky far away on darkening
    Should have traded the wife for a quad bike

    You're selling Big Steve short! He's one of the good guys. Also very sensible to have him along if you're going to shoot and extract stags.

    Good to hear you connected with one, funny how deer can catch you when you're not expecting them, we've all had that happen at some point.

  9. #9
    Yes, it is true Big Steve is tops and a bit of a tank..... any requests just pm me and i'll pimp him out to those interested

    Finnbear, Donk is now Big Steve's new name that's pricelss

    Oh Si! Roe 400 yards..... hard work for an overworked Umpa Lumpa slave perhaps. Will courier down Donk for you when needed !

  10. #10
    Stevie is a ex donkey walloper anyway ,you could have had DL with you and still done all the work yourself he was slacking on the rope on Friday night mmmmmmmm he just doesn't like reds ho ho ho

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