Two Glasgow boys, Archie and Jock, are sitting in the pub discussing Jock's forthcoming wedding.

Ach, it's all going magic," says Jock. "I've got everything organised
already: the flowers, the church, the cars, the reception, the rings, the minister, even ma stag night...

Archie nods approvingly.

"Hell, I've even bought a kilt to be married in!" continues Jock. "A kilt?" exclaims Archie, "That's grand; you'll look pure smart in that!

"And what's the tartan?" Archie then enquires. "Och," says Jock, "I'd imagine she'll be in white..."