"Would you take one of my knives on Safari?"

Can Royal Mail deliver?

  • Yes of course - they will deliver when they promise.

    Votes: 5 20.8%
  • Yes they can deliver - but not when they promise.

    Votes: 7 29.2%
  • No - they will fail to deliver either 'on time' or at the correct address.

    Votes: 3 12.5%
  • No - it is a knife and they will no longer entertain delivery of such dreadful things.

    Votes: 9 37.5%

  • Total voters
    24
Early to bed last night, them up all night with V&D.

On one of my many trips to the loo, a massive spider dropped from the loo roll and then stole my phone.

“Excused boots” this morning: just thinking of using the knife to cut my own throat! Have seldom felt this unwell. The rest of the boys are out.

Meds. now on board and normality slowly returning.

A large bird (no not that kind) has been tapping on my window. I think he is trying to rob me. He is too late, that fcuking huge spider already has my phone…
 

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Kudu Bull and Cow taking a drink this morning.
 

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So why did the postie ring the doorbell and then chuck the package over the hedge? :-|
Ever had a delivery from Amazon?

You are lucky they don’t just hurl stuff over the fence without ringing the doorbell.

At least when RM ring the bell, (provided of course you are in), it lets you know that a parcel has been delivered and you can go and look for it, in the hedge…
 
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Reactions: VSS
Ever had a delivery from Amazon?

You are lucky they don’t just hurl stuff over the fence without ringing the doorbell.

At least when RM ring the bell, (provided of course you are in), it lets you know that a parcel has been delivered and you can go and look for it, in the hedge…
Evri have got to be the worst. They don't even stop their vehicle. They just hurl the parcel out the window as they pass the end of our lane, 200yds from our house!
 
Early to bed last night, them up all night with V&D.

On one of my many trips to the loo, a massive spider dropped from the loo roll and then stole my phone.

“Excused boots” this morning: just thinking of using the knife to cut my own throat! Have seldom felt this unwell. The rest of the boys are out.

Meds. now on board and normality slowly returning.

A large bird (no not that kind) has been tapping on my window. I think he is trying to rob me. He is too late, that fcuking huge spider already has my phone…
Maybe the bird is a Toucan and just looking for a nice refreshing can of Guinness!
Shame about the V&D......I'm sure you'll recover and be able to regale us with more tales of derring do!
 
Tips

Do pack Imodium and electrolytes. I made the rather schoolboy error of thinking that South Africa is not as testing as Mozambique. It is. Pack the meds.

Meanwhile. I see Tommy the Toilet (a place I know well) Terror is back..

Always check the bastards have not slipped into your boots.
 

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