Well, this thread certainly took off in a hurry.
To the OP (
@Mrs Dama dama ), I think you are on the right path. Many here have given opinions and advice, some helpful, some...trying to be helpful.
First the rifle:
Without naming any particular brand, this will depend on your stature. If you're of the petite build, than a youth model would probably be best. If you're of the more sturdy or taller build, than many more options in standard LOP (length of pull) stocks will be available to you. Since you said you were intending to stalk deer with this rifle, you'd be wise to think about how heavy the rifle will be, understanding that the lighter it gets, the more recoil you will feel. It's always a trade off. But you also need to decide
how you're going to stalk. Are you expecting to make a lot of offhand shots, or are you planning to use shooting sticks or bipod? If both, which will the terrain/area you hunt, favor? These things will drive you towards
your answer.
As to the caliber:
It's a bottomless pit of arguments about shot placement, retained energy, recoil, flat trajectories and other needlessly argued, phallic compared, bulls**t. IMHO, just pick one you can manage well, one you can get factory ammunition (if you don't reload yet) and is suitable for the game you intend to stalk. If you plan to also hunt/stalk other quarry (like fox and whatnot), that is a consideration as well, though as always it'll be a compromise of sorts. You decide where you may or may not compromise.
Here in the US we have a plethora of female hunters/shooters, which has grown in excess of all other hunting/shooting demographics the last decade or so. So much so, that I believe there are several forums dedicated just for that (female only hunting forums/sub-forums). You may want to consider searching some of those out as well (not to dissuade you from frequenting this site in any way). Sometimes, IME, guys see a female asking for help and end up clobbering her with "help". A female forum allows the male ego to be left out, and women can speak openly and honestly about what does, and does not work, for the female hunters/shooters (guns, clothing, etc.). I have been an instructor, both in the military as a job, and as a civilian within our local club, for the past 25+ years, and it pains me when I see all the "help" being offered when a new female shooter shows up, leaving them even more confused or overwhelmed with decisions than when they originally asked the question. You have it right. Do your research, and make your decision.
As mentioned above, find a reputable and knowledgeable vendor (or two) that you can trust and who can give you good advice. Ask to test fire examples of the recommendations if possible. Weigh your options, but also understand, that in many cases the differences can be minute. Don't waste your time on those type of things and focus on the aforementioned things (does it fit you? Does the cartridge do the intended job well? Is it something I can easily afford to feed? Is it something I can easily manage, both on the shoulder, as well as slung across the back?).
JMTCW from an older guy that has seen many of young (and older) lady take that first step into this world.
For the Forum Mods: It may very well be worth setting up a private, female only, sub-forum that can only be viewed and accessed by those members. A comfortable, non-intimidating place for women to share thoughts and experiences in hunting, without the help from everyone else (unless they ask in the other open forums). On "that other site" that I mod on, we have the same thing for LE/military members; and it works well. Just a thought...