DIARY OF A POM IN AUSSIE.

John Gryphon

Well-Known Member
August 31
Just got transferred with work from Leeds UK to our new home in Mildura, Victoria, Australia.
Now this is a town that knows how to live!
Beautiful, sunny days and warm, balmy evenings.
I watched the sunset from a deckchair by our pool yesterday.
It was beautiful.
I've finally found my new home.
I love it here.

September 13
Really heating up now.
It got to 31 today.
No problem though.
Living in air-conditioned home, driving air-conditioned car.
What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this.
I'm turning into a sun-worshipper - no blasted rain like back in Leeds !!
September 30
Had the back yard landscaped with tropical plants today.
Lots of palms and rocks.
No more mowing lawns for me!
Another scorcher today, but I love it here.
It's Paradise !
October 10
The temperature hasn't been below 35 all week.
How do people get used to this kind of heat?
At least today it's windy though.
Keeps the flies off a bit.
Acclimatizing is taking longer than we expected.
October 15
Fell asleep by the pool yesterday.
Got third degree burns over 60% of my body.
Missed three days off work.
What a dumb thing to do..
Got to respect the old sun in a climate like this!
October 20
Didn't notice Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car before I left for work this morning.
By the time I got back to the car after work, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stuck to the upholstery.
The car now smells like Whiskas and cat ****.
I've learned my lesson though: no more pets in this heat.
October 25
This wind is a bastard.
It feels like a giant ****ing blow dryer.
And it's hot as hell!
The home air conditioner is on the blink and the repair man charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needs to order parts from ****ing Melbourne .....The wife & the kids are complaining.
October 30
- The temperature's up around 40 and the parts still haven't arrived for the ****ing air conditioner.
House is an oven so we've all been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now.
Bloody $600,000 house and we can't even go inside.
Why the hell did I ever come here?
November 4
Finally got the ****ing air-conditioner fixed. It cost $1,500 and gets the temperature down to around 25 degrees, but the humidity makes it feel about 35.
Stupid repairman.
****ing thief.
November 8
- If one more smart bastard says 'Hot enough for you today?'
I'm going to ****ing throttle him.
****ing heat!
By the time I get to work, the car radiator is boiling over, my ****ing clothes are soaking ****ing wet and I smell like baked cat.
****ing place is the end of the Earth.
November 9
- Tried to run some errands after work, wore shorts, and sat on the black leather upholstery in my car.
I thought my ****ing arse was on fire.
I lost 2 layers of flesh, all the hair on the backs of my legs and off my ****ing arse.
Now the car smells like burnt hair, fried arse and baked cat.
****. ****. ****.
November 10
-- The Weather report might as well be a ****ing recording..
Hot and sunny.
Hot and sunny, Hot and ****ing sunny.
It never ****ing changes!
It's been too hot to do anything for 2 ****ing months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week.
****!
November 15
- Doesn't it ever rain in this damn ****ing place?
Water restrictions will be next, so my $5,000 worth of palms might just dry up and blow into the ****ing pool.
The only things that thrive in this ****ing hell-hole are the ****ing flies.
You don't dare open your mouth for fear of swallowing half a dozen of the little bastards!
November 20
- Welcome to HELL!
It got to 45 ****in' degrees today.
Now the air conditioner gone in my car.
The repair man came to fix it and said, 'Hot enough for you today?'
I wanted to shove the ****ing car up his ****ing arse.
Anyway, had to spend the $2,500 mortgage payment to bail me out of jail for assaulting the stupid prick.
****ing Mildura!!
What kind of sick, demented ****ing idiot would want to live here!
December 1
- WHAT!!!! The FIRST day of Summer!!!!
You are ****ing kidding me!
 
If

he comes from *******shire he wont be ha ha

Severe lack of hunting access in WA,nothing like the Eastern States. Is he a hunter?
No he fishes though he’s bonkers his out on kayak with his kids
He’s had a few catches nicked by sharks !!!
He’s obviously O.T. seen shark week on discovery Chanel
He burns aswell
 
he fishes though he’s bonkers his out on kayak with his kids

Send him the link below,I remember the drama really well,look at the bite through the surf ski (think kayak)

After all, who is going to take on a man who has gazed into the eyes of a great white shark? ‘Siera’ has a few strings to his bow – lawyer, viticulturist, VFL & WAFL star, community surf life-saving supporter, WA Community Football Council chairman. But everyone always asks about that day in 1997 when a five metre great white shark decided to take a sizeable bite out of Siera’s fibreglass surf ski while he was sitting atop it, a kilometre south from Perth’s picturesque Cottesloe beach.

“His jaws were fixed around the entire width of the ski, one and a half inches from my feet,” Siera explains. “The next thing the dorsal fin has hit me in the face and knocked me into the water.

“We just looked at each other. He then let go of the ski and went underneath me. I thought that was it. The volume of water that replaced him was amazing – it was just like a scene out of Jaws.”

With the shark somewhere below their feet Siera and fellow paddler John ‘Barney’ Hanrahan were rescued by three exceptionally brave friends who were in the water nearby.

“I was being towed behind another ski – a piece of berley! We reached the reef and I realised I was safe – it was a feeling of total exhilaration, I was laughing.”




 
Send him the link below,I remember the drama really well,look at the bite through the surf ski (think kayak)

After all, who is going to take on a man who has gazed into the eyes of a great white shark? ‘Siera’ has a few strings to his bow – lawyer, viticulturist, VFL & WAFL star, community surf life-saving supporter, WA Community Football Council chairman. But everyone always asks about that day in 1997 when a five metre great white shark decided to take a sizeable bite out of Siera’s fibreglass surf ski while he was sitting atop it, a kilometre south from Perth’s picturesque Cottesloe beach.

“His jaws were fixed around the entire width of the ski, one and a half inches from my feet,” Siera explains. “The next thing the dorsal fin has hit me in the face and knocked me into the water.

“We just looked at each other. He then let go of the ski and went underneath me. I thought that was it. The volume of water that replaced him was amazing – it was just like a scene out of Jaws.”

With the shark somewhere below their feet Siera and fellow paddler John ‘Barney’ Hanrahan were rescued by three exceptionally brave friends who were in the water nearby.


“I was being towed behind another ski – a piece of berley! We reached the reef and I realised I was safe – it was a feeling of total exhilaration, I was laughing.”




Blood hell !!
ive told him he’s crackers
Thanks I’ll send it on pal
 
Never been there but I'm told Fremantle has one of the most agreeable climates in Aus with near constant sea breezes.

Not sure what Leeds man was expecting from Mildura in the middle of summer. Could be worse though. If he'd moved to Darwin he'd have gone troppo and been either dead or in jail by now.
 
Anywhere in Aus during summer has heat. I cant get over the way people "love the heat" and spend all day on the beach laying in the blistering sun until they either look like a tomato or a Zulu.
 
Well that pretty well sums it up. I worked in Mildura from November to February about 10 years back. It was bloody hot and really did take some getting used to. We had a week of plus 45 degrees and I was building a second storey inside a tin shed, the metal was so hot I had to wear welding gloves all day to handle things. Flies were bad in the mornings mainly as they rose up off the grass. Not that there's much grass. There was a pool but it got well into the thirties so didn't cool you much.
All that said I did learn to deal with the heat and really enjoyed my time over there. Guess some folks think it's all sunshine and wine in Mildura. Oh it is!
 
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