Why do people ********?

[Woodsmoke]

mindless idiots throwing the word retard about

I'm very sorry to hear about your daughter. I, and every one else here, have the utmost sympathy for you all, of course.

However, it's hardly fair to call someone out over the fact you happen to take the use of a particular word personally, is it? No particular offence was meant to you, or anyone else. It's a sad and ridiculous state of affairs when this PC nonsense has everyone second-guessing themselves as to whether or not they're going to inadvertently offend someone. If it's obvious that no offence is meant, then it's pretty bad form to take it regardless. Just my opinion

 

[BryanDC]

I remember many years ago, I knew a guy that worked as a driver and valet for Maranello, the Ferrari dealer in Egham, Surrey. He told us he had a special condition on his driving licence that allowed him to break the speed limit because it wasn't good for the cars to be driven at only 70mph.

 

[Roro]

Great thread. Very funny, we have all met these planks, usually saddo's who have nothing going on in their lives and have to big themselves up. On more serious note though, we here in ireland got the right to licence pistols back about 15 years ago. But our minister for justice, on seeing the walt lunacy of the chap in the link below, who was using centrefire pistols to run "bodyguard" courses for other impressionable idiots, decided to ban our newly liberated pistols. We managed, by basically begging, to keep our rimfire pistols, but no more centrefires.

I had to give up my 1911 .45 acp, because a gang of wallys wanted to play secret ninja. So walts can be dangerous.

The Baron of Castleshort - ARRSEpedia


This guy also talked himself into the home office to advise on security, even though all he is, is a nurse in the T.A.

 

[sikamalc]

After many many years of taking all sorts of clients out stalking, whether its just for the one outing or all week, I have seen and heard just about everything. Some just cant help coming out with all this crap. It dosnt impress anyone, in fact they make a laughing stock of themselves.

But I would like a £5 note for everyone that has told me he was in the army and was a sniper. Had a few of those, and most couldn't hit barn door at 20yds.

 

[bowji john]

I had a boss when I was still in the forces who had a wonderful sign on his desk that he would reveal at the appropriate moment

I have to admit to copying it and using it myself

Not original but always made me chuckle

It read

'' I'm partial to a bit of bull***t myself but I do enjoy listening to a real expert - you were saying ....? ''

 

[bowji john]

Same gentleman also had a tin of air freshener on his desk that he had taped over and rewritten the words ''bullsh*t repellent'' - which he would lavishly spray in the air when you came up with some 'bone' excuse

 

[Mungo]

Anyone watched 'Meat Eater' on Netflix? Do so - super programme.

And then listen out for people recounting, perfectly, some of the episodes as if it happened to them. Until I started watching it, I couldn't understand why there seemed to be such a huge and sudden surge in the number of UK stalkers hunting in the Pacific Northwest, Alaska, Wyoming, the Canadian arctic etc etc.

 

[tarponhead]

I actually think it is the opposite way round and that these people have such delusions of grandeur that they sort of believe their own lies.....

I love it when I meet one of these folk and I always encourage them to lie more (for my own personal amusement) by pretending to be impressed and I like to see how extreme they can get!
I once met a guy when I was catching fish from my local pier (in Cornwall) who told me that many years ago he had actually caught a 15ft Tiger Shark from that very pier I was fishing from! Another chap told me he'd caught a 250lb Conger Eel here. Fishermen always seem to take it one step too far.

Which pier was it? It might have been me... If it was the tiger shark, I caught on the fly, that was definitely me

 

[HandB]

There's a gunshop a few miles south of Croydon where the proprietor has some impressive stories on offer. If they are real he would be the most ally bloke in the UK

 

[Roro]

Anyone watched 'Meat Eater' on Netflix? Do so - super programme.

And then listen out for people recounting, perfectly, some of the episodes as if it happened to them. Until I started watching it, I couldn't understand why there seemed to be such a huge and sudden surge in the number of UK stalkers hunting in the Pacific Northwest, Alaska, Wyoming, the Canadian arctic etc etc.

Excellent programme that. Unusual in that it does not rely on fake dramas like a lot of american shows.

 

[SimpleSimon]

I remember many years ago, I knew a guy that worked as a driver and valet for Maranello, the Ferrari dealer in Egham, Surrey. He told us he had a special condition on his driving licence that allowed him to break the speed limit because it wasn't good for the cars to be driven at only 70mph.

That reminds me of a fella who once told me that his dad (bear in mind we were both in our 20s, not kids) had his car engine replaced by the manufacturer for a much higher spec one as a "special order". He needed it because he was a former parachute regiment medic and the ambulance service regularly called him out to help them.

 

[SimpleSimon]

I wonder if anyone on this thread has actually made up an absurd lie about an absurd lie they were told...
Now that's deep...

 

[paul o']

Yup I once dived off the Avon bridge swam over to the bank on me back side stroke, As I got out i found I had 4 trout in my pockets ? now thats handy i thought and being a tad hungry I cooked them on the rocks using an old bottle i found on the bank ! I used this to catch the sun and grilled them on hay that was growing just nr the fence and as i remember now I had also found two lemons floating next to me as i swam over so it turned out it just fine and dandy that November morning

 

[td]

Yup I once dived off the Avon bridge swam over to the bank on me back side stroke, As I got out i found I had 4 trout in my pockets ? now thats handy i thought and being a tad hungry I cooked them on the rocks using an old bottle i found on the bank ! I used this to catch the sun and grilled them on hay that was growing just nr the fence and as i remember now I had also found two lemons floating next to me as i swam over so it turned out it just fine and dandy that November morning [/QUOWas the water coldTE]

 

[paul o']

In no way was it could the tide was out ?

 

[jimbo1984]

Remember that time basc said they would robustly challenge stuff

 

[Woodsmoke]

Remember that time basc said they would robustly challenge stuff

And then bravely watched us all fed to the lions

 

[jimbo1984]

And then bravely watched us all fed to the lions

That's the one , still at least they're the " voice of shooting "

 

[paul o']

 

[shakey jake]

I was on a pest control course and a bloke was recounting the amazing shots hed pulled off regularly shooting bunnies at 320 with his 22 lr dont remeber if it was head shots but what a guy