Fellas, I’m a bit grumpy today. I haven’t got anything to complain about at all, it’s family news I think, the knowledge that others in Blighty and elsewhere are struggling terribly with the fall-out from lockdown, as are a whole bunch of you guys.
I really like the write-ups we see here, the triumphs, trials and tribulations. So to cheer myself up I put it to my wife and kids, what are your favourite hunting memories? Cue heated debates and arguments... but we got there in the end. Here are some of our favourite recent hunting photos and their short stories, and I encourage you to do the same! Have a think about a photo or three that put a smile on yer boat-race, and post them up.
Iain’s favourite: I told you being quiet would work!
My boys were 9 and 11 when this photo was taken. We’d been hunting all day, unsuccessfully, and the boys were completely over it. I was getting seriously cheesed off with their noisy walking... heavy foot falls, the sound of gaiters rubbing together - swish swish swish - and the complete inability to hold in noisy farts and the subsequent giggling. It was Deer O’Clock and I was determined not to go home empty handed, so I said to them, Right, I’ll head up here and you wait and slowly count to 60, then start walking up the track behind me. Slowly. OK?
They got to 45 when there was an almighty BANG! followed by the sound of a very dead red hind rolling down through the bush. As I stood there getting over the ringing in my ears and sudden burst of adrenaline, two small boys arrived breathlessly squawking DIDYAGEDDIT DIDYAGEDDIT DIDYAGEDDIT??? It was a seminal moment in their stalking education. Be quiet. Works every time.

Stuart’s favourite: My first pig hunt
We keep Staffordshire Bull Terriers of course, and they are addicted to chasing pigs. Unfortunately, pigs here have a habit of chasing them back, and the mortality rate for pig dogs is high. So hunting pigs with our pet Staffys was banned by Mum. Like “don’t you dare” type banned.
One afternoon, a mob of small “eating pigs” unwisely turned up at the cabin, and with no boar or sow in sight I decided to break the rules. Not normally a good idea... Armed with a 12ga pump action shotgun and slugs - just in case mummy pig turned up - our two muppet dogs were unleashed. With massive excitement and noise, they simultaneously caught one each, with me and Stuart in close pursuit, and Stuart dispatched the second one himself with his own heirloom knife. That was a proper big boy moment for the young lad. He’ll never forget it.

Mum’s favourite: Peacock pie and Maori korowai
I was really surprised by Mum’s choice, because she has heaps of deer and bok to choose from, but instead she’s selected some small game hunting that had an unexpected but highly fulfilling outcome. Peacocks are a pest here, and we hunt them for the pot and their plumage, using rimfire and sneaky sneaky catchee birdie tactics. They are incredibly difficult birds to hunt, far more difficult than pheasants. They have incredible eyesight and will spot an intruder from hundreds of metres away, seeking cover immediately. On this occasion we had to walk around the back of the birds’ bush cover to get the high ground, then move in commando style (which I am crap at), so we could get a decent shot from about 60m.
The Wife whacked three birds including a prime cock with her 10/22 before they even knew she was there. I polished off two runners with a couple of fluke shots with the CZ 455, including the second cock, also with a full train. The unexpected outcome was the The Wife took the train feathers to a friend, who then invited her to participate in the making of a traditional Maori feather cloak (korowai or Kahu Huruhuru) at our local marae. This resulted in a whole new network of relationships with local Maori women that has generated some very positive outcomes. Funny, because on the day she didn’t really wanna go because it was too hot!

My favourite: The Eastern Cape possum trapper
Impossible really to pick a favourite, but when I thought about the last several years in New Zealand, the one that really stands out is what happened after this completely crap “selfie” was taken. I’d hiked for two days up into the Raukumara Range in the Eastern Cape of the North Island, using the braided rivers as the track. It was hard going, with multiple river crossings and wet feet all day. There was so much deer sign it felt like I would walk into deer at any moment, but I had this infernal constant breeze up my rear end, which no matter what direction I was heading, was blowing my scent in front of me. So on the second evening I decided to change tactics, and picked a fresh and deer whiffy game trail coming down from the mountains to the river, and staked it out from downwind. A red hind and her yearling duly trotted out of the impenetrable bush right on the last of the light, and both bought a .308 pill right where it counts.
About 30 seconds after this photo was taken I was hailed by a hearty male voice from about 30 yards away. I absolutely crapped myself, he gave me such a fright. Middle of nowhere, not seen a soul, full of adrenaline... turns out this guy had been watching me from his camp for the last hour or more, he knew I was in the right place and didn’t want to spoil it. His name was Simon and he is a professional possum trapper, with camps right through the Raukumara Range that he keeps stocked with regular trips upriver in his little jetboat.
After I got over the surprise and shock that I had been under observation all along by this enormous hairy bushman, and overwhelming glad that I hadn’t missed or screwed up the shots, Simon invited me to overnight at his camp. “Camp” was more like a “Glamp”, it was fantastically comfortable and well stocked, beating my planned very modest bivvy hand over fist. We gutted the two deer and hung them up, then scrambled 70-80m up the slipface on the other side of the river into a flat glade, you’d have no idea it was there from river level, totally secure and safe. What a good bloke he was too, we drank some beers (cold beer!) and then had some “other stuff” that was locally cultivated, and some fresh bush dinner. I slept like a corpse in a hammock. The next day, Simon took me on a mission checking his trap lines, and I learnt more about life in the bush that day and the next, than I would in ten years of books. I’m still in touch with Simon and he calls in here from time-to-time, but I am yet to get him to make the trip down to our hunting block. One day mate...

I really like the write-ups we see here, the triumphs, trials and tribulations. So to cheer myself up I put it to my wife and kids, what are your favourite hunting memories? Cue heated debates and arguments... but we got there in the end. Here are some of our favourite recent hunting photos and their short stories, and I encourage you to do the same! Have a think about a photo or three that put a smile on yer boat-race, and post them up.
Iain’s favourite: I told you being quiet would work!
My boys were 9 and 11 when this photo was taken. We’d been hunting all day, unsuccessfully, and the boys were completely over it. I was getting seriously cheesed off with their noisy walking... heavy foot falls, the sound of gaiters rubbing together - swish swish swish - and the complete inability to hold in noisy farts and the subsequent giggling. It was Deer O’Clock and I was determined not to go home empty handed, so I said to them, Right, I’ll head up here and you wait and slowly count to 60, then start walking up the track behind me. Slowly. OK?
They got to 45 when there was an almighty BANG! followed by the sound of a very dead red hind rolling down through the bush. As I stood there getting over the ringing in my ears and sudden burst of adrenaline, two small boys arrived breathlessly squawking DIDYAGEDDIT DIDYAGEDDIT DIDYAGEDDIT??? It was a seminal moment in their stalking education. Be quiet. Works every time.

Stuart’s favourite: My first pig hunt
We keep Staffordshire Bull Terriers of course, and they are addicted to chasing pigs. Unfortunately, pigs here have a habit of chasing them back, and the mortality rate for pig dogs is high. So hunting pigs with our pet Staffys was banned by Mum. Like “don’t you dare” type banned.
One afternoon, a mob of small “eating pigs” unwisely turned up at the cabin, and with no boar or sow in sight I decided to break the rules. Not normally a good idea... Armed with a 12ga pump action shotgun and slugs - just in case mummy pig turned up - our two muppet dogs were unleashed. With massive excitement and noise, they simultaneously caught one each, with me and Stuart in close pursuit, and Stuart dispatched the second one himself with his own heirloom knife. That was a proper big boy moment for the young lad. He’ll never forget it.

Mum’s favourite: Peacock pie and Maori korowai
I was really surprised by Mum’s choice, because she has heaps of deer and bok to choose from, but instead she’s selected some small game hunting that had an unexpected but highly fulfilling outcome. Peacocks are a pest here, and we hunt them for the pot and their plumage, using rimfire and sneaky sneaky catchee birdie tactics. They are incredibly difficult birds to hunt, far more difficult than pheasants. They have incredible eyesight and will spot an intruder from hundreds of metres away, seeking cover immediately. On this occasion we had to walk around the back of the birds’ bush cover to get the high ground, then move in commando style (which I am crap at), so we could get a decent shot from about 60m.
The Wife whacked three birds including a prime cock with her 10/22 before they even knew she was there. I polished off two runners with a couple of fluke shots with the CZ 455, including the second cock, also with a full train. The unexpected outcome was the The Wife took the train feathers to a friend, who then invited her to participate in the making of a traditional Maori feather cloak (korowai or Kahu Huruhuru) at our local marae. This resulted in a whole new network of relationships with local Maori women that has generated some very positive outcomes. Funny, because on the day she didn’t really wanna go because it was too hot!

My favourite: The Eastern Cape possum trapper
Impossible really to pick a favourite, but when I thought about the last several years in New Zealand, the one that really stands out is what happened after this completely crap “selfie” was taken. I’d hiked for two days up into the Raukumara Range in the Eastern Cape of the North Island, using the braided rivers as the track. It was hard going, with multiple river crossings and wet feet all day. There was so much deer sign it felt like I would walk into deer at any moment, but I had this infernal constant breeze up my rear end, which no matter what direction I was heading, was blowing my scent in front of me. So on the second evening I decided to change tactics, and picked a fresh and deer whiffy game trail coming down from the mountains to the river, and staked it out from downwind. A red hind and her yearling duly trotted out of the impenetrable bush right on the last of the light, and both bought a .308 pill right where it counts.
About 30 seconds after this photo was taken I was hailed by a hearty male voice from about 30 yards away. I absolutely crapped myself, he gave me such a fright. Middle of nowhere, not seen a soul, full of adrenaline... turns out this guy had been watching me from his camp for the last hour or more, he knew I was in the right place and didn’t want to spoil it. His name was Simon and he is a professional possum trapper, with camps right through the Raukumara Range that he keeps stocked with regular trips upriver in his little jetboat.
After I got over the surprise and shock that I had been under observation all along by this enormous hairy bushman, and overwhelming glad that I hadn’t missed or screwed up the shots, Simon invited me to overnight at his camp. “Camp” was more like a “Glamp”, it was fantastically comfortable and well stocked, beating my planned very modest bivvy hand over fist. We gutted the two deer and hung them up, then scrambled 70-80m up the slipface on the other side of the river into a flat glade, you’d have no idea it was there from river level, totally secure and safe. What a good bloke he was too, we drank some beers (cold beer!) and then had some “other stuff” that was locally cultivated, and some fresh bush dinner. I slept like a corpse in a hammock. The next day, Simon took me on a mission checking his trap lines, and I learnt more about life in the bush that day and the next, than I would in ten years of books. I’m still in touch with Simon and he calls in here from time-to-time, but I am yet to get him to make the trip down to our hunting block. One day mate...

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