First deer...the good, the bad and the 'unexpected'

Hi all.

First off, apologies. This could be a long one, but I will try to keep it concise.

This is a quick recount of a fairly recent (first) stalking experience with a regular member on here who has been absolutely amazing in terms of supporting me and his generosity. By way of a disclaimer, we have already had long chats about the day and we're cool

So, a 4am rise saw me driving through the dark and the cold to a service station to be greeted by a newish friend who was taking me on my first deer stalk. We'd met at the same place before so that he could assess my shooting 'ability'...I wouldnt call them groups, but the scope was on high mag and he was satisfied (thats my excuse anyway!)

So half an hour later im walking through a pitch black woods with a relative stranger armed with 3 firearms. It did cross my mind (and Ive shared this with him...he laughed) that I might not make it out alive.

Arrived at the high seat and settled in. Wasnt freezing but after 3/4 of an hour my knees were feeling it. Adrenaline took over mind. Took turns to glass with the binos and NV for movement but nothing. Prepared for the long wait.

Very suddenly we both spotted movement to the right. About 3-4 deer moving through at pace. On command I took aim and flipped the safety. There was a small window for shooting (about 50yrds away) and deer 1,2 & 3 passed so quick I couldnt take the shot. A slightly bigger one then paused. Afraid it would follow the others my friend barked at it and it froze. I squeezed the trigger of the Tikka and all went blurry tbh. I leant a few things in the following micr-seconds. a) a moderated .308 makes a very loud bang at 6.45am b) I had know idea if i'd hit the target at all c) thoughts were, 'that was easy'/'****! what have i done?'

I was asked 'How did the shot feel?' to which I answered 'good' simply based on not having pulled it or snatched the trigger. Absolutely no idea what had happened tbh.

We waited, stripped off (well, you know...not totally) and took a roundabout route to the place we'd last seen the deer. A quick look around had me worried. No sign of anything. Spent about 2 mins studying a leaf that turned out to just have a natural red spot. Idiot. I felt sick at the thought of having injured the deer...considered the possibilty that I'd missed cleanly over the top and felt immediately better. A careful look further led us to a bonefide blood trail. I felt ok with it actually, having seen and read similar accounts many times. Also the hope stayed alive that the deer wasnt suffering.

Then I saw it. Just down an incline not 15yards from the shot. Very still. We did the usual slowly and my friend confirmed it was gone. I was hit by a bizarre combination of relief and anxiety that I'm still thinking on.

After much sweating (the quad's winch had packed in...and I ended up nearly face first in the stream trying to haul it uphill...much to the other's amusement!) we had the deer on safe ground. It was at this point I was asked 'Fancy a picture?' at which point my insides turned upside down. I wasnt ready to feel joy or pride and was concerned about looking like 'the great white hunter' at a moment where I felt anything but. My problem entirely and Ive realised in retrospect that I was ill prepared for the reality of taking such a beast (having only shot quarry as large as a rabbit before). Not just the shot...the whole deal.

Throughout, my friend was incredibly supportive. He noticed my temporary wobble. He thoughtfully suggested I go for a walk to avoid the gralloch if not ready. I declined and was glad I did. I learned loads from watching and asking questions (we had since been joined by another syndicate member who had got lucky and was kindly prepared to talk me through the process).

By 10.30am I was driving south again towards home with it all done and dusted. Mind everywhere I stopped at a friendly pub as it opened for a pint (my earliest ever!) to mull things over. Was very quiet and contemplative for the remainder of that day but woke the next feeling ok about it all. By the evening Id have been happy to do it all again!

Sorry for boring you. It was my very first opportunity, one that I thought would never happen anyway. Maybe it rings a few bells with some of you? Maybe not.

Finally. I dont want to mention his name for fear of embarrassing him (regulars may have clocked it), but the guy on here who made all this possible is forever in my debt. His generosity, time, understanding and advice have been invaluable & I cannot thank him enough. Truly.

5-6 weeks later Im sat here with the cabinet about to be delivered, the FAC app about to go in the post and the kind offer of an evening out with the same legend for a few rabbits hanging. Cant believe my luck! Seriously.

Thanks for reading & have a great 2018 all.

KR,

Shep

 

[The Singing Stalker]

Having done various things from riding motorbike and diving and shooting etc etc etc. It is always difficult for the first and second and third. Over time you get to be more confident with your kit and abilities so you go from wtf happened....... To, I heard the sound of the hit, I saw the reaction to the strike.
To me it is always good to worry about the animal. That way you are more likely to let a bad potential shot walk away and only take a safe shot. There is always another day.

well done on you first.

 

[An Taín Hunting Outfitter]

What an absolutely first class read. Well done on the stalk and sharing all the minor details which better enables us to see through your eyes. That moment that you walk up to your downed deer and it lying there. 95% feeling of "I've finally done it!" and the other 5% in reverance for the offering of it's life. Great feeling. The feeling just gets better and better and sometimes the deer that takes ages to find no matter how small is always the best.

What rifle are you thinking off? When you fail to find a good sized deer you might start wanting a tracking dog next!

Well, the season has a way to go yet so you might only be getting warmed up.

 

[roryh]

Mate it is good that you recognise the gravity of taking a life and the range of emotions that can present at first. I still thank the animals I take regardless of how daft it may sound.

Looking for blood trail the leaf will invariably have a red dot/side.

Glad the winch was goosed ....another memorable aspect.

Now have a sup of something good and plan the next trip.

 

[Ray7756]

A day you will never forget , and a great write up to boot
Cheers
Ray

 

[Chasey]

I was going to say no problem mentioning me, but having described me as a "Legend" you have condemned me to merciless **** taking from the rest of the syndicate who really know me.

First off, Id like to say it was both a joy and an education to take out someone who has such strong feelings.

I like to take novice / new stalkers out stalking so they can see what its all about. It's not particularly generous, as how can something that brings me so much pleasure ever be considered to be costly?

In my eyes its simply passing on the good fortune I had meeting Willow Bank and Jo Farmer who did it for me and, (despite our later fall out) Tony from the old DAGS deserves a mention too.

Having a half dozen deer rock up less than an hour in to our first ever attempt was Christmas and my birthday rolled into one. Yes, the first few were on a mission so presented a significant challenge to any stalker but the last doe responded well to a cough and I made a mistake.

I said NOW

And the shot rang out, the deer arched and I knew it was hit, and of course with a heart shot, it ran.

I felt it was going to be OK but there's always the moment of doubt with a heart shot, so I didn't want to make much of it.

When we found her dead as dead could be not more than 10m from the point of shot, my heart leapt and I was happy for us both. In my eyes not only had I given an opportunity to a deserving sole but it had ended with the best possible outcome, a cleanly shot deer.

It wasn't till the moment of asking if a picture should be taken to commemorate the occasion, that I realised my error.

Now, I always had believed that the gralloch was the moment when people could suddenly realise the reality of deer stalking. I have seen a few pull the trigger with glee but go pale at the gralloch, but this was the first time I had experienced someone with the depth of emotion that the enormity of killing such a magnificent beast was the trigger for regret. Suddenly my shout of "now" wasn't the gentle encouragement someone needed to accept the shot was on, but was instead a shove out the door of the aircraft for a reluctant sky diver. Once pushed and with a successful outcome I wasn't faced with a jubilant adrenalin filled man, but a damaged sole deep in contemplation.

In short I felt a level of guilt over that shove

He realised this and set out to tell me it wasn't my fault and hoping I wasn't angry with him, but i don't feel any resentment or anger in any way. If this day had shown him that deer stalking was not for him, my work is equally done. My only regret is virtually demanding the shot. Next time ill stay silent and learn that not every one feels the way I feel about hunting.

As it is Sheprador seems to have decided to carry on in the sport and that's great.

Sadly having now learnt that shooting a deer is a significant thing, his next lesson is sitting in the cold and seeing sod all for hours

That might tip him over the edge towards Golf

ATB

Chasey

 

[paul o']

As others will say its easy to pull the trigger , so having all the waves of emotion was normal and its good you felt it , it shows that you understand the gravity of doing so . Happy your first outing was what you hoped it would be, sounds like it has now put you well on the path to a wonderful sport, So you enjoy it as the rewards it brings will be many , but remember your the driver and never let another tell you to pull the trigger if your not happy to do so its better to leave it be than to pray you got it right.
Well done carry on . Golf

 

[chiron]

Really good write up and comment from Chasey. It reminded me of the first beast I shot at which was a roe and I got the shakes because I was standing on tiptoes resting the rifle on a thick hedge and had the guide at my shoulder urging me to take the shot. I took the right hand front leg straight off and the beast ran into the distant wilds of Dorset never to be found.
I experienced the whole gamut of emotions and cancelled the last two outings of my trip to try rationalise what had happened. I eventually concluded that the stalk was a real buzz and that so long as I worked hard at my shooting that I would be happy killing the deer. I am still happy to shoot deer safe in the knowledge that animal will go into the food chain. I am becoming increasingly dubious about game shooting, big bags of floppy pheasants which have virtually no value being shot by people who seem to have little respect or regard for their quarry.

 

[Sheprador1973]

Hey Mark...secrets out eh?

As I said we've discussed this all at length and everything is totally ok (and always was...cos we talk). One thing I would say publicly though is that I dont think Mark has/had any need to use words like error and guilt. It was ME that was ill prepared mentally...and Ive gotten over it. If he hadnt coughed Id still be there waiting to shoot!

Very interesting to hear from others on this thread (thank you) about their experiences. Maybe I'm not such a freak and/or soft Southern Jessie? Its not necessarily that easy if you weren't brought up with it, and arguably shouldn't be. But I dont feel I should feel bad about contemplating what I chose to do in the end anymore. Its so funny this 'game'. This is something that has been niggling at my insides for over 30 years (not just deer but hunting in general, including angling). Something I feel I need/want to do. Totally at odds with anything my family, friends or colleagues could ever understand. As such, I think its harder these days (at least for me) to justify that need. I have many friends my age who get their (family time-out) kicks from alcohol, theatre, gigs, football, clothes, holidays etc. But I find little interest in those things tbh. I also think that, f*@k it, lifes too short! I'd rather regret something I have done than something I never tried.

Thank you to Chasey for being so awesome, in many more ways than hes maybe aware of. I know he enjoys it (sharing the experience with newbies like me) but he certainly doesnt have to. And the opportunities hes given me already are hard to be thankful enough for.

THanks to all the above and especially to MC.

KR

 

[HertsMark]

Fantastic read and excellent follow up from Chasey. Hope to be going out for my first stalk in January. Have the benefit of an experienced friend to help me on my first outing, I hope I share the same experience of emotion as you. I'll let you all know!

 

[willowbank]

Nice one Mark, good to put something back in the pot, well done.

Willowbank.

 

[Tayles007]

Great write up, and well done Chasey, how lucky this man is to get you to get him out there. It is a responsibility of all of us to enrol, teach and "mentor" others into this lovely sport of ours, even if, as you say, that is to help them realise they love the shoot, but not the kill so keep it to targets. Our challenge in the South East is finding a half decent syndicate / bit of ground where you can still take newbies out under your guidance.