Honest advice required

[teyhan1]

This is loosely related to stalking.

Today I successfully sold my business. It was not not a Kings ransom but enough for about a year of doing nothing without any worry.
So what should I do?

I have an offer to go and be trained as a commercial poultry unit farmer. Good money and okay career prospects. But my wife works away from home 3days per week and I therefore have to look after my kids. This is not employment friendly, so my wife and I are looking at hiring an au-pair. I could then throw my self into the chicken job and get a new career but the kids (5 yrs and 9 yrs) will see their parents less but we will have plenty of money and maybe able to send them to private education (as the eldest has ADHD)

Alternatively I could do commercial stalking. I have taken clients before although I have pretty much stopped as the politics were getting too much. I will have enough time to search out new grounds and can expand them with the funds available.

I really am not honking my own horn and genuinely would like some cold hearted advice particularly from pro full time self-employed stalkers. When I worked as a stalker I had another job at the same time so have never done it as a sole full time occupation.

Basically do I throw my dream and possibly only opportunity of being a full-time deer manager away in favour of a better life and education (possibly) for my kids?

Really stuck on this one

 

[Paul at Fechan]

I've just finished as a full-time teacher to go pro and also focus on the training sides of stalking, very scary time. In honesty if you're brave enough to give it a go and work hard you deserve to make it mate, best of luck!

 

[Hunting Experiences]

I've just finished as a full-time teacher to go pro and also focus on the training sides of stalking, very scary time. In honesty if you're brave enough to give it a go and work hard you deserve to make it mate, best of luck!

I agree if you're brave enough to give it a go and work hard you deserve to make it mate, GD luck

 

[pheasant sniper 1]

Get yourself signed on and give the kids more than you ever could working full time....

I agree with Paul, and your only here once so having a crack at the dream has got to be worth a shot.

Go for it mate

 

[SussexFallow]

Look for a good Scandinavian au pair
​atb Steve

 

[teyhan1]

Look for a good Scandinavian au pair
​atb Steve

I said throw myself into the chickens not the au-pair

 

[John Gryphon]

I would forget about anything for 6 months except to go to a few of those destinations that are on the wish list that would make for great hunting.

 

[David T]

Sorry matey but I say you owe it to your kids to give them the best start you can.

 

[Solwaystalker]

It took me years and a bit of unexpected cash to help me decide to go self-employed , i havent looked back since
wish i had done it a lot sooner , saying that im lucky i have a lot of good stalking most of it fairly local

 

[Labrat]

Teyhan


I broke up with my wife a but under ten years ago, I had trained as a keeper and stalker, up until she got pregnant that was my career - the needs of a young family led me to another better paid job, where I worked huge amounts of overtime and lost out on a lot of our family life to allow her to stay at home and bring up the kids in the best environment we possibly could with a secure job, good prospects etc.

when we broke up my kids were aged 6 and 3 - frankly it destroyed me, she moved away to live with new love - for the next five years I worked my balls off, weekends etc to pay the CSA and pay to travel and see the kids, every single day of leave was used in spending quality time with my kids.

in 07, a career opportunity opened up to move closer to them, I snapped it up, it was a good career move too... lasted 6 months, last in first out!
After this, I re-evaluated my life, moved into a houseshare (not easy for a mid thirties bloke) and got a job in something completely different (huge pay cut) in my other passion, bicycles - worked for a very prestigious bike company for the past five years, loved every minute, I got back into stalking somewhere along the road, and was close enough to see the kids regularly.

a year or two ago my eldest daughter (13 then) started to self harm, this led down a very stressful road for her mum, and for my youngest daughter - eldest has now been diagnosed with Aspergers, my youngest started displaying similar symptoms, very aggressive & meltdowns - we decided the only option open to us was to separate them, and for her to come and live with me

last year, we put this into place, I was given a council flat (great location next door to a lovely country park, bonus!) she came to live with me, and I'll be honest, its been bloody hard looking after a disabled child on my own, a real struggle - my employer started being a complete and utter **** over time off for medical appointments etc - in march of this year my boss tried to discipline me for a minor issue, I went the whole hog and walked, threatening to sue for discrimination, we settled for a significant lump sum.

I've now gone on to benefits as her full time carer - surprisingly I'm not much worse off financially, and we've seen real improvement in both her and her sisters conditions - realistically I'll be in this position for the next four years, and I've decided to use this time to get my stalking experience back up to speed and look at my future career - I've approached some known local stalkers to offer a hand with nothing expected in return, other than the chance to relearn what I knew 20 years ago. so far no luck but one is keeping me in mind for doe season to help with carcasses etc. (I'm open to offers!)

Why am I giving you the whole spiel?

Because through this whole thing theres one thing I've learned - your kids are only young once, treasure every day with them, forget work and careers and sensible, if you can spend time with your kids and take the time to follow some of your own dreams, then material possessions and money and au pairs mean **** all - and your kids will get far, far more from having their parents there spending time with them than they will from a private education, posh house or nice car.

Hope that helps!

 

[Klenchblaize]

I suspect you know the answer to this as a man with a young family and attendant long-term responsability so I'm not going to be the one who tells you what you may prefer to hear rather than what common (admittedly unadventurous) sense dictates.

You also allude to a certain frustration with where the stalking profession is headed if not already docked and as so helpfully laid bare for all to see throughout this site.

Were you single I wouldn't hold back from telling you what I'm sure would be more palatable but that chance has past so forgive me for my bluntness but deal with it.

Good luck though with whatever you do.

K

 

[teyhan1]

I suspect you know the answer to this as a man with a young family and attendant long-term responsability so I'm not going to be the one who tells you what you may prefer to hear rather than what common (admittedly unadventurous) sense dictates.

You also allude to a certain frustration with where the stalking profession is headed if not already docked and as so helpfully laid bare for all to see throughout this site.

Were you single I wouldn't hold back from telling you what I'm sure would be more palatable but that chance has past so forgive me for my bluntness but deal with it.

Good luck though with whatever you do.

K

I fear your few words, speak volumes.
Should I be happy with what I have and knuckle down?
Be happy with the stalking I have? A job that provides for my family?
And reach the grave saying I wish I had just done that?

 

[The Singing Stalker]

Is your passion going stalking or taking someone else stalking? From conversations with people ie pros, stalking can be long hours and not that much family time with some sleep in between. Unless you live on the land you manage. Some of the pros have a 4 or 5 hour drive to their shoot. Combine that with early starts and late finishes.

and if your lucky you may get to shoot once a year because the client comes first.

Any self employed business is going to be hard work and I don't know about enough about either to comment but, the easy way is to work for someone else. To be honest, whilst you could garner opinion here I think it would be imperative to goand sit down with a couple of the pros and get the hard facts re time away and money. The upsides and the downsides.

with what little I know I would go for the Swedish au pair. But that is me. Some relationsships are strong to survive the long hours, some aren't.
But I don't know what I am talking about cos I ain't no pro.
​Good luck with the process.

 

[Dama]

Starting out as a pro stalker isn't easy, with a wife working away for three days a week it isn't really on. At busy times, it is a 7 day a week job, at quiet times 1-2 days a week. Childcare will be a nightmare and hard to justify an aupair at quiet times. Bank your cash, go rear chickens for 10 years, and reassess things then.

 

[Pedro]

Some good advice in the above posts. Having read them, if I were you, I'd sit down and prioritise what's important to you, followed by what would you enjoy. There'll be a way to achieve what is most important and at the same time have some enjoyment, although that may have to be compromised to a degree, at least initially.

Only you can decide, but once you have, stick with it and give it everything. Good luck.

 

[R8 user]

Starting out as a pro stalker isn't easy, with a wife working away for three days a week it isn't really on. At busy times, it is a 7 day a week job, at quiet times 1-2 days a week. Childcare will be a nightmare and hard to justify an aupair at quiet times. Bank your cash, go rear chickens for 10 years, and reassess things then.

I think that is good advice.

 

[limulus]

Tough decision.
I missed both my kids' childhoods jetting off around the world with a high flying job and really regret not being there for them. They both had great education and have very good jobs now which I guess is the payback.
If I had my time over I would have gone for the dream of being a surgeon instead of just playing at chemistry/biology.

 

[NorthDorset]

At risk of throwing a spanner mate its not Landshire is it? If so PM me.

Well done on the business exit!

Kids don't care how much cash you have they just want your time and love (ideally both parents) until they are a bit older. Then they will notice that they can't have what their school friends have.

Spend time with your kids every minute you can but ultimately you need to provide for your family as best you can.

If you have ever watch "Who do you think you are?" You will have seen how humble stock suddenly take a turn in fortune on the back of a private education. If you want what's best for your kid you will work your arse off to provide one for them. Don't ever think that private schools are full of toffs. Many a day student is dropped of in a working mans van.

I have been made redundant twice. Both times I thought right I'm going to take 3-6 months off now. Both times come Monday I have shat myself I don't have a job. A buddy who did take 6 months off now hasn't worked for 2 years and will soon be living off credit cards. It's hard to get back into work after a break.

Good luck with this crossroads. It'll at least give you time an cash to sort that Ruger out!

 

[HCS]

I think the best available education, is the most valuable thing you can give a child.
I'd want to be stalking,
but I would be Rearing chickens.

Czech or Slovakian Au pair, met a few in the past highly reccommended.

 

[User00047]

Teyhan1,

It is difficult to give advice without knowing your situation in more detail but I would say it really is down to you to decide if the commercial stalking would be viable or not.

where will the clients come from? do you need to consider advertising?
do you have enough bucks/deer to shoot enough to live off? venison sales? trophy fees?
do you know a good accountant? there are many tax benefits to being self employed
have you seen your business advisor at you bank? they can be very helpful.
will you be happy at the chicken job?
self employment means you have unlimited flexibility but also means that you need to work very hard to do well.
the price of stalking in the UK is going up and the sport is becoming more popular. I think you'd find plenty of clients to fill the diary.
how understanding is the Mrs?
I reckon if it's your dream, then you owe it to yourself to have a go. If not, get a French Au pair.