Sad times

Wow, what an emotional story of love
I could not comprehend what you've been through of late.
Enjoy what you have now as it doesn't last.
 
So sorry to hear of your brothers passing. This cancer stuff is a horrible disease, something that most of us have had to deal with, either directly or with a close friend or family member.
My sister very recently had a fight with it, but has come through winning.

Life is never easy at times, but your brother will remain with you and your family always. I hope the coming days will be filled with laughter and fond memories of your brother whilst sharing them with your family. Take care of yourself.
I send my sincere condolences and also from my two colleagues of the site.
 
Your brother sounds like he was a remarkable man so try to remember him for the good times - Those memories will remain with you for the rest of your life! I know only too well what it feels like to loose a brother who you obviously thought so much of after loosing my brother just over a week ago. You were with him right to the end, and that is something special. I was too much of a coward to be with my brother at the end as I wanted to remember him as I always knew him - Maybe that is something that will haunt me for the rest of my days!
My thoughts go out to you and your family for your very sad loss!
 
So sorry Boggy for your awful loss, but you had one hell of a brother.
Treasure the amusing incidents at the end, they will enhance the other memories too.
My lady has just had good results after two major cancer bouts which are debilitating to all concerned. I just hope it was our joint prayers that helped. Her daughter decided not to tell her mother until her Mum had the results, but she told us this week she has breast cancer, operation next week. What a couple of years, but we will beat it, we are determined.
 
Please accept my condolences, can't have been an easy time for any of you. Must give you a shout next time I'm passing. Kind regards Dave
 
What a feller your brother was! An interesting life, even at the end he was obviously a determined man. At least now he can RIP. Many condolences to you for the loss of your brother and sister, RIP.

A good eulogy, I hope it was cathartic writing it.
 
bogtrotter said:
My brother was diagnosed with cancer a month ago he was given anything from a few days to a maximum of two weeks he died on Tuesday exactly a month to the day from being admitted to Hospital..
This is the story of his last month in some parts extremely sad in others extremely funny at least I found it so..
Some background on my brother, He was a middle sized man not very tall 5 foot 8 inches .
and weighed around 15 stone he was a bit of a recluse hobbies were shooting and fishing his
nickname was poacher though he wasn't actually one, his other hobbies were his terriers, his racing pigeons and his garden
Like me his working life started as a keeper unlike me he didn't stick at it something he regretted, he gave up the keepering and had various different jobs worked as a machine man on the roads, and for some time in a malt barn where they malted barley for whisky production ,even worked as a Ghillie for me for a season and used to help me at fox den time as he had very good patterdale
terriers some time later he would give up work all together to care for his wife who suffered from Lupus a
horrible illness.
My brother was a Christian something I can't profess to be though I do admire those who have faith at best I suppose I would be described as an agnostic my brother was not always so
he lost an infant daughter due to misdiagnosis by a doctor after that he shunned the whole medical profession including dentists he would extract his own teeth when needed.
it was also at this time that he found religion.
When he was admitted to hospital that 15stone man had shrunk to 5 stone and could no longer walk or so we thought more of that later he was given some tests and scans they discovered he had bone cancer but they said that was secondary they did not discover the primary source and tests were so invasive that he would not survive them nor was he strong enough to get chemo.
When he was given the prognosis he asked if he could go home to die they said yes but he would need to get stronger first and it would take some time to get a care package in place none
of this was really true as they had told his daughter he was highly unlikely to leave the hospital as they said he only had days to live, his daughter told them that was unfair her father was a strong man who did not lie to others and did not expect to be lied to, if they did not tell him the truth she would so they did tell him so much but still maintained he would get home if he got his strength up.
he whole heartedly entered into the plan to build his strength up started taking protein drinks between meals and even started physio it worked he put on 2kg that's when he caught covid
they told us that was the end not only because he was not strong enough but because of his dislike of medics he had not had any vaccinations
They said they would make him comfortable and let him slip away, I went in to say goodbye he was connected to a myriad of tubes and seemed to be unconscious sat with him a few hours
left when his daughter came in she said she or her brother would sit through the night with him.
I was surprised next morning to find him sitting up in bed how are you Jim he said, fine I replied how are you ? sh@t he said but I'm going to make it I need to go home there is nothing left of me he said there is bedding in the corner rap me up in it and when you get a chance take me out the fire exit and put me in the back of your car and make a run for it.
Oh man I can't do that, well if you won't I'll find a way he said, escape wasn't mentioned again I think I had let him down.
It was around the time that he was recovering from Covid if recovering is the correct term that our sister visited him she lived a hundred plus miles to the North and traveled down by train
she spent all day with him before travelling back in the evening some time during that night she had a stroke that left her completely paralysed down the left side , brother took it badly thinking it was the stress of seeing him in the condition that he was in that had caused it.
Meantime he was becoming more and more determined to get home he was stepping up the exercise to build up his strength though it was pitiful to watch by the he was little more than a skeleton he had no body strength but he had the heart of a lion this was when he fooled us all he some how got hold of a bottle of Malt whisky said he got it from another patient but I'm
not sure.. He asked the Doctor that since he was dying could he have a dram at night the Doctor said he did not see why not just so long as it was only one, and what about a cigar my
brother said I do like a cigar with my dram the Doctor said not in the ward but if some of the staff can get hold of a wheel chair and have the time to take you outside then IU see no reason why you should not have your dram and cigar, I thought this was odd and did say to him you haven't drank for years he just smiled and said I thought I would start again I thought odd but humour him.
Nothing happened for a few days then all hell broke loose he eventually found a male nurse who was willing to take him outside for his dram and cigar (he had got his son to bring hm in a pack of cigars) he told the nurse not to bother with the wheel chair he thought he could mana with the zimmer he had been exercising with so off they set slowly down the corridor all of a sudden with lightening speed he threw the zimmer under the nurses feet at set off running down the corridor of course he only made a short distance before collapsing .
the staff all laughed about it but I think that was when they decided he was a liability and decided to move him.
They moved him to a small cottage hospital only three miles from where he lived and he seemed happy with that,the day after moving him our sister died she had a heart attack while in hospital unexpected as she had been making a good recovery.
That night my brother had a bad fall seriously hurting himself, he said he hurt himself trying to go to the toilet though I suspect it was another escape attempt.
Over the next few days the family were constantly being called to his bedside be told it was the end but he recover again and again , my daughter and I went North for my sisters funeral
this past Tuesday while there we again got a phone call saying this was the end went straight to the hospital as soon as we got back not knowing what to expect .
He was asleep breathing very heavily sat by his bedside for about ten minutes when he opened his eyes and said I can't beat this smiled at his daughter but his arm around her or at least attempted to grabbed my hand with his other hand and was gone.
R.I.P. My wee brother














he was in
Click to expand...
I cry & grieve for you & the tremendous loss you have just endured. R.I.P Weee brother
 
Hello Bogtrotter

Sad to read of your brothers passing - in my thoughts and prayers and hope the loss eases for all as soon as can.
Your memories of your brother will keep him to the fore.

L
 
bogtrotter said:
My brother was diagnosed with cancer a month ago he was given anything from a few days to a maximum of two weeks he died on Tuesday exactly a month to the day from being admitted to Hospital..
This is the story of his last month in some parts extremely sad in others extremely funny at least I found it so..
Some background on my brother, He was a middle sized man not very tall 5 foot 8 inches .
and weighed around 15 stone he was a bit of a recluse hobbies were shooting and fishing his
nickname was poacher though he wasn't actually one, his other hobbies were his terriers, his racing pigeons and his garden
Like me his working life started as a keeper unlike me he didn't stick at it something he regretted, he gave up the keepering and had various different jobs worked as a machine man on the roads, and for some time in a malt barn where they malted barley for whisky production ,even worked as a Ghillie for me for a season and used to help me at fox den time as he had very good patterdale
terriers some time later he would give up work all together to care for his wife who suffered from Lupus a
horrible illness.
My brother was a Christian something I can't profess to be though I do admire those who have faith at best I suppose I would be described as an agnostic my brother was not always so
he lost an infant daughter due to misdiagnosis by a doctor after that he shunned the whole medical profession including dentists he would extract his own teeth when needed.
it was also at this time that he found religion.
When he was admitted to hospital that 15stone man had shrunk to 5 stone and could no longer walk or so we thought more of that later he was given some tests and scans they discovered he had bone cancer but they said that was secondary they did not discover the primary source and tests were so invasive that he would not survive them nor was he strong enough to get chemo.
When he was given the prognosis he asked if he could go home to die they said yes but he would need to get stronger first and it would take some time to get a care package in place none
of this was really true as they had told his daughter he was highly unlikely to leave the hospital as they said he only had days to live, his daughter told them that was unfair her father was a strong man who did not lie to others and did not expect to be lied to, if they did not tell him the truth she would so they did tell him so much but still maintained he would get home if he got his strength up.
he whole heartedly entered into the plan to build his strength up started taking protein drinks between meals and even started physio it worked he put on 2kg that's when he caught covid
they told us that was the end not only because he was not strong enough but because of his dislike of medics he had not had any vaccinations
They said they would make him comfortable and let him slip away, I went in to say goodbye he was connected to a myriad of tubes and seemed to be unconscious sat with him a few hours
left when his daughter came in she said she or her brother would sit through the night with him.
I was surprised next morning to find him sitting up in bed how are you Jim he said, fine I replied how are you ? sh@t he said but I'm going to make it I need to go home there is nothing left of me he said there is bedding in the corner rap me up in it and when you get a chance take me out the fire exit and put me in the back of your car and make a run for it.
Oh man I can't do that, well if you won't I'll find a way he said, escape wasn't mentioned again I think I had let him down.
It was around the time that he was recovering from Covid if recovering is the correct term that our sister visited him she lived a hundred plus miles to the North and traveled down by train
she spent all day with him before travelling back in the evening some time during that night she had a stroke that left her completely paralysed down the left side , brother took it badly thinking it was the stress of seeing him in the condition that he was in that had caused it.
Meantime he was becoming more and more determined to get home he was stepping up the exercise to build up his strength though it was pitiful to watch by the he was little more than a skeleton he had no body strength but he had the heart of a lion this was when he fooled us all he some how got hold of a bottle of Malt whisky said he got it from another patient but I'm
not sure.. He asked the Doctor that since he was dying could he have a dram at night the Doctor said he did not see why not just so long as it was only one, and what about a cigar my
brother said I do like a cigar with my dram the Doctor said not in the ward but if some of the staff can get hold of a wheel chair and have the time to take you outside then IU see no reason why you should not have your dram and cigar, I thought this was odd and did say to him you haven't drank for years he just smiled and said I thought I would start again I thought odd but humour him.
Nothing happened for a few days then all hell broke loose he eventually found a male nurse who was willing to take him outside for his dram and cigar (he had got his son to bring hm in a pack of cigars) he told the nurse not to bother with the wheel chair he thought he could mana with the zimmer he had been exercising with so off they set slowly down the corridor all of a sudden with lightening speed he threw the zimmer under the nurses feet at set off running down the corridor of course he only made a short distance before collapsing .
the staff all laughed about it but I think that was when they decided he was a liability and decided to move him.
They moved him to a small cottage hospital only three miles from where he lived and he seemed happy with that,the day after moving him our sister died she had a heart attack while in hospital unexpected as she had been making a good recovery.
That night my brother had a bad fall seriously hurting himself, he said he hurt himself trying to go to the toilet though I suspect it was another escape attempt.
Over the next few days the family were constantly being called to his bedside be told it was the end but he recover again and again , my daughter and I went North for my sisters funeral
this past Tuesday while there we again got a phone call saying this was the end went straight to the hospital as soon as we got back not knowing what to expect .
He was asleep breathing very heavily sat by his bedside for about ten minutes when he opened his eyes and said I can't beat this smiled at his daughter but his arm around her or at least attempted to grabbed my hand with his other hand and was gone.
R.I.P. My wee brother














he was in
Click to expand...
What a brilliant man such a great account even made me shed a tear...condolences sir
 
Dear Sir,

My deepest condolences to you and your family, l was finding it difficult to comment on your loss when l first read your post in mid March the reason being l too had lost a brother a short time before.

Life goes on and so must you, accept my apologies for not replying sooner.

@bogtrotter
 
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